Last Sunday I posted ‘God, If you ran out of husbands just say that then.’
I just laughed again while I typed it. In my single walk, I have definitely had moments where I could relate to this and it’s hilarious. I felt it, I thought others could get at least a chuckle, so I posted it.
I know it was all out of love, and I appreciate it, but a wide majority of the comments, DM’s and emails were driven out of pity.
I appreciate the prayers but please don’t cry for me.
Have I felt that phrase in my soul? Yes. Does that make me hopeless? Absolutely not. It makes me real.
You can have full faith that something will happen and still have moments of frustration.
They can and will simultaneously happen at the same time. I know who I am, I am confident in God’s guidance and I am content in His plan for my life, whatever it will be. I am continually working on being a positive, healed, whole Alicia that will be available to a real courtship that leads to marriage, rooted in purpose. I want a husband, but I don’t need one. She is good over here.
As a matter of fact, this time of isolation has promoted my personal growth in so many ways and I thought I would share three of the lessons that I have received specifically in relation to relationship:
Do not covet other relationships. I have been seeing a ton of breakups and divorces over the last couple of months. Many site having revelations from spending so much time together. You never see the inner workings of marriage from the outside. Stop comparing your singleness to a relationship that you don’t even know is truly solid. Appreciate the moment you are in right now, stop comparing and count the blessings that your singleness brings. They are there. Celebrate them.
I have work to do. We are constantly growing. With growth comes change. In order to be ready for any relationship, we must put in our own individual work. We often talk about never finding anyone who is “ready” but are you? The construct of being ready in itself can be argued, but we certainly can’t expect to find someone who is doing the work if we aren’t.
Sometimes the answer is no. This is an unpopular opinion but sometimes the answer to a prayer is no and this includes prayer about relationships. I have really changed the direction of my prayers to start with “If it is in your will Lord.” I move my feet in the direction of all of my visions but know that his plans are best and will prevail. Some would see this as giving up, but for me it is a beautiful opening to more than I could ever imagine. I could never paint the picture like He can and don’t want to limit my prayers to my own abilities that pale in comparison to His power.